I talk to couples every day who feel this way. They are frustrated and do not know what to do. Sometimes they feel overwhelmed and feel like making positive changes is too hard. They are stuck and do not know how to move forward, or they feel like it would take too much work.
Relationships do take effort, time, commitment, and intention but the results are definitely worth it, and it might not be as hard as you think! You have the power to change your relationship and create the one you want and deserve. I have written a book telling you how to do just that, Unmasking Secrets to Unstoppable Relationships: How to Find, Keep and Renew Love and Passion in Your Life.
For today’s post, I want you to consider that relationships are not built or changed by big events. Yes, it is fun to celebrate anniversaries or holidays with your partner. Gifts, surprises, and special times together can be fun, but relationships are created and maintained moment by moment.
I want you to change your thinking about relationships in order to get out of that rut and get unstuck. Start thinking in terms of moments not occasions. There are moments in each day where you can make a positive or negative difference in your relationship. Why not make a positive one? Small things add up and make a more lasting impression. Look for ways to uplift your partner each day.
Guys, look for ways to let her know she is on your mind; tell her how nice she looks, thank her for being your partner, do something around the house without being asked, or give her an unexpected hug and kiss. These are just a few ideas to get you started. Maybe make a list of things you can do and review it every day. The idea is to let her know she is loved and cherished in small ways, and it is important to do it often.
Ladies, look for ways to tell him you appreciate all he does for you; flirt with him, show him more physical affection, encourage him, and tell him how happy you are to be together. Find ways every day to show him appreciation and respect.
In parenting, we talk about teaching-moments with children. We look for times when we can teach them life lessons or raise their self-esteem. We want to do the same thing in our intimate relationships. Look for moments every day to praise your partner and let them know how much you care about them. Make sure your communication is positive, and that you talk as often as possible.
If you are not as happy as you would like to be in your relationship, start with small moments every day. Don’t worry so much about the big picture just yet. You might need some help sorting out bigger issues, but for today, start creating moments of love, moments of tenderness, moments of happiness and moments of appreciation. Find small things to start with and let it grow from there. You might be surprised how small moments can add up and make big changes in your relationships.
Leave us your comments below. What small things do you do that make a difference in your relationship?
If you would like help transforming your relationship, please contact me via my website: www.lorianndavis.com.
Lori Ann Davis, MA, CRS
Certified Relationship Specialist
Radio Talk Show Host: Ivyberadio