What to do before your next date!


Are you single and tired of dating guys that do not turn out to be boyfriend material?  Do you find yourself getting fed up with the dating process or thinking that there are no good guys out there? Or maybe you are just getting back into the dating game and want to avoid feeling this way.

We live in a time when the roles of men and women are blurred.  It is wonderful that women are now equal and taking on the same responsibilities as men in the world. This, however, is creating more confusion in the dating world.  A few decades ago, roles were much more defined, and the dating process was clearer.

Men and women both possess masculine and feminine energy, but we have one primary energy at our core. This is usually feminine energy for women and masculine energy for men. Masculine energy is about doing, accomplishing, pursuing, leading, and problem solving. Feminine energy is being, feeling, expressing, following and receiving.

Women spend much of their time now acting in masculine energy. They need this to be successful in the workplace and to take care of a home and children. In this process, they have often lost touch with their feminine energy. It is important to be able to fully embrace your masculine and feminine energy and to be able switch back and forth as appropriate.  We all have different styles and personalities, so your feminine self will be unique to you. It will take on its own flavor and style. I am not suggesting that you fake anything. It is important to be genuine.  I am suggesting that you embrace your feminine energy and be prepared to act in this energy before your next date!

This polarity between masculine and feminine energy is what draws men and women together. It is what causes the attraction between us and sparks to fly.  It is not how you look, how intelligent you are, or your personality that attracts him to you.  It might cause an initial interest, but it is not what keeps a guy coming back for more dates that eventually lead to the relationship you are looking for.  It is your softness and vulnerability that keeps him attracted and makes him want to be your boyfriend!

So before your next date, I want you to feel confident and to be strong on the inside. I want you to know you have so much to offer and that any guy would be lucky to be in a relationship with you. That self-confidence is very attractive to a guy.  You are going to feel strong on the inside but soft and feminine on the outside.  Your actions and communications will be warm and receptive.  It is how you present yourself and your attitude. It is ok to show your intelligence and to look your best, but do so casually. The right guy will see how beautiful and smart and sexy you are.  You want him to connect to your heart which is how he will fall in love.

One of the most important changes you can make in your dating is to let the guy do the pursing. Men are still hunters at heart, and they will appreciate what they have to work for. Men do not like women to be controlling or to try to manage the relationship. They equally do not like drama or games. So I am encouraging you to date with class. Be honest about what you are looking for in relationship but allow him to pursue. Remember, you are awesome, and he would be honored to have you. So if he doesn’t pursue you, maybe it is a blessing. He might not be someone who is looking for a relationship, and it is better to find that out as soon as possible. If you are coming from your feminine energy core, there are guys out there who will want to pursue you! Don’t worry about the others. You don’t want them anyway.

So be feminine, drama free, and pleasant to be around. Men want a relationship with someone who makes them feel good. The advantage of this is that you will feel good as well. When you work on being the best person you can be in order to attract the right guy, you end up a happier person as well! Your attitude is what matters most. So go out there and connect with others in a positive way. Be your best authentic self, and you will attract your soul mate.

I would love to hear your success stories. I would also like to hear what other information you would like to hear from me. What problems can I help you solve? Send me an email and I will answer you in my next blog. Also, be on the lookout for my next blog post on how to know which guys are boyfriend material and which ones aren’t!

You might also be interesting in reading: The Art of Flirting


Lori Ann Davis, MA


About Lori Ann Davis, MA, CRS

As a certified relationship specialist ,my primary goal is to help empower individuals and couples so they can live richer, fuller, happier lives. I have a masters degree in clinical psychology. I am a certified relationship specialist in Charlotte, NC. I do individual sessions over the phone and teach workshops for couples and singles locally. I am also the host of the "Ask Lori" radio show on If you are struggling to find happiness in your relationship, or if you would like to attract and keep your ideal partner, I can help. I work with clients who are struggling to find happiness in their relationships. They would like to have better communication and to feel more understood. They would also like to experience more passion in their relationship. I have learned through my education and my own life's journey, what the keys to a successful, unstoppable relationship are. I will motivate you, inspire you, teach you, and coach you every step of the way. These techniques have made such a positive impact on my life and my clients that I can't wait to share them with you.

3 responses »

  1. […] more information on this topic read my blog, What to do Before Your Next Date, or listen on You […]

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